The Fine Art of Poaching

Let's face it people, we have all been there on either side of this court. No, I am not talking about tennis or even eggs. I am referring to the circumstances when you see someone else wearing something new whether it be clothing or jewelry. When someone you know, a close friend or just an acquaintance is sporting a new car, watch, or even an object for their home, kitchen etc. You see it, and you just have to have it.

You are tempted to ask them where they got it. This would be the quickest way to acquire this item. But you are hesitant. You figure you can do a little reconnaissance and figure out where and how to get it. You go about doing so. You may ask a couple of benign questions. You inspect the item with subtle glances in their direction, you may pick up and touch the item if possible. Some items are obvious. This makes it easy. But this is where my friend you begin to go wrong. If you manage to gather the information necessary for the acquisition and actually take it down, you have poached.

Poaching is the act of copying someone else's taste and personal style without giving proper credit and acknowledgement when due. This is not a crime but it is frowned upon. Fortunately it is very easy to avoid this blunder which can actually suck the pleasure out of the ownership of said item.

I have a dear friend with whom I have discussed this topic numerous times. We have come to the conclusion that when anyone is presented with this dilemma the decent thing to do is immediately compliment the item and the owner, ask intelligent questions about it and then admit right then and there your intentions to go out and buy said item.

By doing this you have paid appropriate homage to this person of good taste. You can freely sport or use the item and whenever complimented give credit for the idea to the original owner. You need not do this for the entire useful life of the item, just while it is new.

Just sayin'.

My Toughest Critics

So, last night when I was coming up with this blog layout etc, I had one of my darling daughters by my side on my bed looking for dresses on line for an upcoming Bat Mitzvah. She initially laughed at the idea and expressed some concern probably for her self and her own reputation. But after it came together and there was a photo of her dog and a few quotes from her beloved Papa, she said "it's okay mom, its looks legit". Phew! Now I just had to inform the other two. This did not go as well.

Upon pick up from the High School the oldest called me a name I cannot repeat and the middle did the same without batting an eye. The oldest explained that this was was something the housewives on TV would do, so typical. "What did you do get a blogspot?" Mom, please you are such a loser!

There is certainly no risk of my ego getting out of control in this household. The fact that I have any self confidence is a miracle at this point. Of course they do think I am pretty cool when they need a ride to this or that and a crisp 20 for "downtown". They love my friends (of course who wouldn't?), they love my clothes, and they are always game for dining out or watching TV together. I certainly don't want to be their "friend" that is always a huge mistake. But when they point out the ways in which you are perhaps acting your age it is a reminder that I am old enough to be their mother!

Puppy Prozac and Other Resolutions

After moving in with my mother who is in her late 70's my three daughters and I had some adjustments to make. Who am I kidding? My poor mother! The modest home I grew up in with three siblings was now going to become a sorority of sorts with Grandmother as the "house mother". Five women under one roof with only a male mixed breed rescue dog to temper the insanity. Unfortunately the dog was turning out to be the biggest freak. What had been an overly protective but pseudo-manageable pet in the previous living situation was now a vicious attack dog barking at anyone passing by without a dog on lead and bounding to the front door salivating and growling at the wind blowing. The final straw was two incidences of nipping or biting individuals. According to my late father "that's when the dog goes.......". Now I get that and actually agree with that philosophy but when this ultimatum was delivered to me by Grandmother as I came through the front door on a not so great day, exhausted and already ready to cry, I lost it. 2009 had been a tough year for my family and I could not conceive of another loss for my kids. I had a ten day period to figure this out. The neighbors were complaining about the barking. The excessive anxiety was causing aggression.

First trip was to Dr. Rockwell our vet. Prozac was one of the suggestions he made along with special training. Sign me up for the prozac I said. Initial dose 20 mg/day but possible to increase to 40 mg/day if needed. Verdict: 40 mg/day for Max was the charm. Barking. A friend had recommended a barking collar, very humane, it senses the vibration on the larynx and sprays a shot of citronella to their face and they do not like it. My daughter Meggie and I headed up to PetSmart. Of course the collar recommended was 95.00. I didn't want to get the cheapest model and have it not work. I figured that if it did not work out I could return it ( I was told) and then I would use that same money to euthanize the dog. Either way I was spending 95.00.

Long story endless, we arrived home, assembled the collar, buckled it onto Max's neck and sent him outside onto the porch where he did most of his barking. He attempted one barking jag and swiftly was corrected by the spray. Verdict: Max is now mute.

My mother, who loves a cause immediately was concerned over Max's new behavior. Was he over medicated? Is he suffering wearing that collar? My reply was simply, he's alive mom.

So I am finally doing this. I must admit that I got my inspiration from PattyP. I loved your blog and the great tips you shared!

My mother used to tell me that I should write a book someday. This idea came to her after receiving many long letters from me while I lived in Kiev for my first year of marriage. The descriptions of the bleak depressing scenery and some of our crazy experiences gave me plenty to write about.

Most people that know me well would call me opinionated, stubborn and strong willed. I don't care or expect you to agree with me but you will know my opinion if you ask. Close friends and family don't have to ask. It's comin' anyway. So from time to time if you decide to tune in here you may come across my thoughts, ideas, suggestions and or opinions about anything under the sun, and you don't have to buy what I am sellin' cuz I am "just sayin".....